*Even after you read this.. You still don’t know me :)
My favorite show is Quantum Leap, Fave movie is Teen Witch, I only like RED Skittles, I like the Smurfs and Rainbow Brite and collect figurines, I collect stamps from all over the world, Have a love/hate relationship with chopsticks, Im arrogant, I pace when I talk on the phone, I’m neurotic, Im fashionably early, I love dirty boys that smell good, Im HUGE on LOYALTY. (Death before dishonor type of shit), I like my sneakers to be dirty, dingy and smelly...(lmao), I admit I dabble in country and pop (oh so fucking what. you do too.) I’m a hustler. You cant out hustle me. I curse like a sailor, Like Jill said, You can solve any problem you have watching an episode of sex and the city, I have road rage, where the state has actually put me in a 4 week class to control my anger issues while driving the streets. And at the end all I got was a lousy certificate... I cant hold a note to save my life..But it wont stop me from "screeching", I love black nail polish, I live a very purple life style, I enjoy reading, I love learning about the criminal system, cults and gangs. I thrive on conspiracy theories, I love the History channel and CNN, and I can watch A&E all day... I’m not ashamed to say I watch Full House, Saved by the bell, and That’s so raven on the regular...I want to FREE PALESTINE damn it, I don’t want to be rich, then all my cousins, aunts and uncles will bug the hell out of me and I already cant stand 85% of them, I say "Kick rocks a lot",
I didn't drink till I turned 21, and never have smoked that "shit" ever.
I fall and trip all the time. I’m clumsy as hell. When I travel, I normally don't pack till a cpl hrs before my flight.. I forgive and forget too easily..Im working on that.. cuz NO ONE is worth forgiveness that quick.. You need to feel my wrath for cpl days..
I’m such a Fucking Lady, I have manners believe it or not,I cry when I watch Oprah, see an old person eating alone, or a bully picking on a kid. I have the bestest, brightest, beautifulist, loyalist circle of friends/sisters ever (Brit,Sash,Chels,ReeRee, Amira) "All I need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriends "...
I love my Skully, she’s the most anti-social, stank breath dog ever, but she’s the bestest and she loves me and that’s all that matters..Im an ESL student. I have the craziest, most insane dreams. and 75% of the time.. they come true... I really think I have a 6th sense.. Or that I have psychic abilities but I have not tapped into them fully.. Any psychics reading this.. Help me out.. I need a new hustle..
I want to raise my children in New York or London, I want to live on a farm and milk cows, wearing flowery dresses and running barefoot in the fields with daisies in my hair, baking apple pies, minus the cinnamon of course, running after chickens and riding horses and going to sleep at 9 pm..... now that’s a sight to see.... my lucky number is 13 and I have a bad habit of adding up random numbers to see if they equal 13, I have a mixture of ADD/OCD depending on if I’m doing what I want to do or not, I’m convinced I was a pirates whore in a past lifetime.
I’m NOT funny nor do I try to be (but I must admit I crack myself up)
I’m spoiled, I’m demanding, I like vodka tonics with 3limes,I fucking hate cinnamon and will throw up if I smell it..I love guns (the one I had got taken away from me, once again, anger issues) I will faint at the mere sight of needles...I LOVE vintage dresses and clutches, Deep down I’m a girly girl, I consider US Weekly and WWD my weekly bibles, not to be mistaken with my 3 other monthly bibles, W, Vogue and V... (Sorry all you religious folks out there.) I love cotton candy, I’m pro masturbation, I like bubbles, bubble wrappers, bubble gum, bubble yum.. Damn it anything with the word bubble...and I still believe that Pluto is a mofo planet!
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3 comments:
This was dope.
ur hilarious...
my favorite number is 13 too.
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